Even more Folger's crystals!

With the warp core powered by Folger's crystals the HMS Upskirt arrives at the system of Thinkofanamefullofforbodinglater and prepares to science the hell out of any Hive Collective ships that have the temerity to show up.

The Pilot admired his reflection in the forward screen, some idiot thought glossy screens were good. They were, it was much easier to clean the ketchup off. It did not help that his reflection was brilliantly scintillating due to the incautious application of glitter to his freshly polished bonce. "No Hive Collective ships." He reported, squinting past his reflection and trying to oggle the Communications plaything.

"Double grog rations." The First officer declared, he was in charge as the captain was inspecting the fleet.

This repeated, "no Hive Collective ships."

"Double grog rations."

"No Hive Collective ships."

"Double grog rations."

"No Hive Collective ships."

"Double grog rations."

"No- wiat... sorry, false alarm, scratches on the screen. No Hive Collective ships."

"Double Grog rations!"

"Keep this up much longer and even The Engine Room Nurses will start getting tipsy. No Hive Collective ship."

"Double- Wait. Is it turend on?" The first officer rushed over the corner and checked the meter, "Someone forgot to wind it up." A dulcet blonge filled the bridge and a few lights came on. "We should get the master-at-arms to fix it."

"Tif? She's useless with electronics." Communications Officer third class Slime Dispenser pointed out."

"She has the right approach though, hit enough script writers with it and the problem will go away." The First Officer looked at the screen, "lovely azure hue there."

"It'll go away in a second, the tubes warming up."

Slime Dispenser perked up, "Sensors indicate azure hue!"

BEEP! BONG! Wubble-wubble-wubble-splinge.

Ensign Lovelyjugs stared at her script full of onomatopoeia and SIGH!

"Would you look at that, Wall-to-wall Hive Collective Storm Tricycles!"

Captain Seymour Dicklogic arrived on the bridge just in time for the credits. He admired the screen, "what idiot replaced our screen with that glossy thing?" He grunted and surveyed the (enemy) fleet with his steely blue eyes, furrowing his brow manfully.

Ensign Lovelyjugs SWOON!

"Time for some science. We need to test the new probe."

The Science Officer perked up a bit as Communications Officer Slime Dispenser was sitting on the sensors and glowing azure hue it was quite pleasing, rather like a very large lava lamp made of female girl! "The Atomic Neutralize Anything Living Probe?"

"Mullet?" Doctor Firm Posterior offered the captain, "milk and sugar?"

"Full special effects." The captain ejaculated guttorally as she also sat on him.

Ensign Lovelyjugs took an extra large swig of her Pure Oxygen and Grog.

PTHUD! SCHWEEE BLINGE GRONK KAZUBBA-ZUBBA-ZUBBA...

"I thought sound didn't travel in space." Captain Seymour Dicklogic cogitated pure masculinity, no wonder Doctor Firm Posterior couldn't stand.

BOOM BLINGE! PTHUD! KABOINK! SHRUBBERY! ELVIS!

"It's new sir, Space 2.0" The science officer admired the explosions on screen.

"Can they hear you scream?" The captain followed up manfully.

AIYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeee OUCH!

"Oh no sir, it's not that advanced." The Science officer admitted. "Except when Ensign Lovelyjugs forgets to close the toilet door."

AIYEE! KETCHUP FACEPALM BOOM! KYA!

"Sorry sir, script writer trapped in the research probe launchers. I left them loaded, just in case." The Science officer admitted scientifically.